10 Questions for Guys to Ask Before they Propose

Planning the perfect proposal means something different to every guy. For some it’s extravagant and over the top. For others it’s low key and out of the spotlight. The one thing you can count on is that every guy wants to get it right. There will be a lot of proposals happening this holiday season, so here are 10 questions that will hopefully give you some ideas to make yours perfect.

park1. What’s her favorite spot?

If you don’t know what her favorite spots around town are, you’re not ready to get engaged! Where are the places you’ve taken her in the past where the romantic factor has hit an all time high? If you’re proposing away from home, think of the type of places she most enjoys. Does she like the park or is she more of an indoor girl? Does she enjoy fine dining or does she prefer a more relaxed environment? Think of all of the places that you’ve taken her in the past. If you can’t go to that exact spot, try to replicate it. You’ll get extra points when you say, “I remembered that you liked that park where we met, and this reminds me of it.”

ballpark2. Does she want an audience?

Our first piece of advice to any guy we do proposal planning for is, “She does not want to be proposed to at a sporting event.” Even if she has said she does, she does not want to be proposed to at a sporting event. Now, this doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want an audience. She could be super excited if you proposed to her in a crowded place where an audience of friends, family, or perhaps strangers get to offer a round of applause once she has said, “Yes!” Be sure you know how she will react. There’s a good chance your plan of proposing didn’t include her running away to hide. If she’s a more private person, make sure she’ll be in a setting where she’s comfortable.

3. What is her favorite movie?

You’d be surprised how much her favorite movie can tell you about the way she’d like her proposal to play out. More than likely she’s watched one with her where a guy has proposed and she immediately went teary-eyed. If that hasn’t happened, perhaps she’s a huge fan of Twilight or Harry Potter. Is there a theme you could set for your proposal that would go along with one of her favorites. The point with this, as with all things on this list, is for you to find the subtle hints that she has given you and prove that you have been paying attention. When she’s telling the story to her friends you’ll get points for life when she says, “I can’t believe he remembered this, but…”

colors4. What is her favorite color?

Sometimes it’s the little things that mean the most. If she’s a huge fan of blue and you have lighting in the room to match, that’s a huge win. If she loves the color red and you have roses on the dinner table she’ll definitely notice. There’s no detail that’s too small when it comes to this moment. She’s going to remember everything about it. She’ll even remember the things you didn’t plan. Twenty years from now she’ll be telling your kids about the day you proposed and you’ll be amazed that she remembered what YOU were wearing, what the weather was like, and a million different other tidbits you’d never even noticed.

couple5. Where did you meet?

Take advantage of the low hanging fruit. Did you meet at a certain restaurant? That could be a great place to start the evening. Did a set of friends introduce you at their house? Maybe you can pretend you’re going over to watch the game and magically the cable is out and there’s a candlelit dinner waiting on their dining room table for you when you arrive. As with everything else we’re pointing out here, the sentimental value of these things will take the romantic factor to the next level. When she knows that you put extra effort into making it special, the brownie points mount drastically!

grandparent6. Does she want family there?

This is a question my husband never would have thought of if we hadn’t talked about it. I had always dreamed that when I got engaged my entire family would be there so they could share the moment with us. This may not be the case for your bride-to-be, but it’s definitely worth asking. She may want it to just be the two of you, but there may be some special people that she would love to be able to celebrate the experience with. The last thing you want is to pop the question and have her recount the story later to her friends and say, “I really wanted my parents to be there to see it, but I got to tell them about it later.” Or, “I really wanted it to be the two of us, but he had our entire family there.”

unhappy7. What does she hate?

This might seem painfully obvious, but in the excitement of letting her see the ring for the first time, you might overlook the fact that she hates the shirt that you’re choosing to wear. Or, she may not be a huge fan of being proposed to when she is in her pajamas without her nails done. If she hates being cold then proposing in a park in January, although picturesque with the beautiful snow, might not be your best bet. These are all examples that may make you roll your eyes, but you get the idea. Make sure you think of everything before you ask the most important question of your life.

8. What’s the budget?

You’ve already spent your life savings on an amazing ring. You’ve gotten it cleaned three times in the last two weeks even though it hasn’t been out of the box. The bottom line is, the ring that you purchased probably set you back a pretty penny. The proposal doesn’t have to be extravagant to be extraordinary. If you don’t have the cash, don’t break the bank. The fact that you’ve read this far proves that you care enough to ask yourself some great questions. Don’t let what your friends have done in the past or what you’ve seen online convince you that you have to go overboard to be effective. There will be plenty more to spend your money on in the coming months!

photographer9. Does she want a photographer?

With all of the things that we carry around these days that have a camera embedded in them this definitely isn’t a must, but if you have some extra money laying around to get a professional photographer to capture the moment, and the moments immediately after it’s definitely worth it. Keep in mind this is only if you feel that she’ll be ok with someone she many not know sharing the moment with the two of you. If she’s more of a private person taking some selfies afterward is just fine. It depends on how much she loves photos, how much you have in the budget, and if you’ll be proposing in a place where you’ll be able to get some good shots.

talking10. Most importantly, just ask!

The key to all good proposals is good communication. You don’t have to give away the fact that you’re going to propose, but you should ask at some point in your relationship what she has envisioned that moment being like. Chances are she’s mapped it out in her head a million times. You may not want to do it exactly the way she’s planned, and you have to consider your wishes as well. This is your moment too. But if there’s a piece of what she’d like that you can implement, you win even more. At the end of the day you’re starting a journey to marriage, and that’s the biggest deal of all. But this is a moment where you get to be a hero. Trust us, after this moment it’s all about her until you head off on your honeymoon.

We hope these tips help you ask the right questions and it makes your quest for the perfect proposal a little bit easier. If you need help executing on the details, or if you find after you’ve popped the question that she’d like some planning help from the pros, just contact us. We’d love to help!

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